Part 3 Apply Your Findings
In her book, Rivadeneira works through the reasons God cares about our individual
identities and how God makes himself known to his people. She also shows women why
it’s not selfish to long to be known and loved for their true selves—as opposed to “just” as mom—and that in fact, revealing the complete woman God made you to be is key to doing “kingdom work.”
While acknowledging that the church hasn’t been particularly helpful in this area,
Rivadeneira also believes that if women want this change, they need to be willing to make it themselves. To help women reveal their real identities and live as God intended them to, she suggests moms need to do such things as:
* Get over the false guilt that keeps you from living as the woman God made you to
be.
* Find out what your “identity in Christ” really looks like. What misconceptions are
you harboring?
* Discover who God sees when he looks at you.
* Identify your gifts.
* Describe yourself in ways that show a piece of the real you.
* Treasure—don’t resent—your limitations.
* Become vulnerable.
She believes doing each of these things—along with drawing out and encouraging other
women—helps each of us live the life God created us to live, by blessing others and
ultimately changing the world through our God-given gifts.
Rivadeneira writes at the end of her book that this is all “pretty exciting stuff when you think that God has ordained each of us to share his grace and love and to transform the world for him! We are called to do it certainly through our children and through our roles as moms, but in all the other ways you’ve discovered as well.”
Discussion Questions
[Q] Do you find the call to transform the world through your children and other gifts
exciting or overwhelming, or both? Why?
[Q] In what ways do you believe God may be calling you to use your gifts to change the world or to show love and grace to another mom? “Mama’s Got a Fake I.D.”
[Q] What can you do today or this week to change the way others see you and your
contributions to the world?
— Ingrid Ramos is a freelance editor and writer. She lives with her family in the
suburbs of Chicago.
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Mama's Fake ID Teaching Point Three: Valuing moms for their unique selves is a means
“Mama’s Got a Fake I.D.”
Any mom who’s felt subject to stereotypes and assumptions, the loneliness of not fitting in, or the hurt of not living up to those stereotypes, knows how wonderful it feels to ultimately become known—and valued. In fact, getting to know another mom as a complete, gifted, specially made child of God, and then loving her because of—and in spite of—who she is, can be a way of showing grace to that woman.
This is what God does with us (Psalm 139), and something we see Jesus do time and again in the Gospels. Read John 4:1–26 and Luke 19:1–10. Consider how Jesus’ talking to, getting to know, and extending truth and grace to the Samaritan woman and Zacchaeus transformed their lives. If we are truly following in the way of Jesus, we should follow this example with one another. This act of being known—for good or for bad—and loved is a picture of the transforming love of Jesus. Since moms want this in their own lives, it’s a wonderful, affirming way to live out the “Golden Rule.”
Discussion Questions
[Q] Think about some ways you feel you’ve been labeled with a “fake I.D.” What are some ways the church could take the lead in getting to know women beyond any one role?
[Q] How has it felt when someone asks about you as a woman—not you as a mom? What’s
the difference between the two?
[Q] What does it tell you about the heart of Jesus that he took time to chat with the
Samaritan woman and Zacchaeus—two people who didn’t fit it?
[Q] What do Jesus’ actions of reaching out to these “misfits” tell you about how we should handle women in our congregation who might not fit traditional molds? Who are some moms Jesus might be calling you to reach out to right now?
[Q] What are some questions you wish others would ask you about yourself? How willing
are you to ask the same of other women?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Any mom who’s felt subject to stereotypes and assumptions, the loneliness of not fitting in, or the hurt of not living up to those stereotypes, knows how wonderful it feels to ultimately become known—and valued. In fact, getting to know another mom as a complete, gifted, specially made child of God, and then loving her because of—and in spite of—who she is, can be a way of showing grace to that woman.
This is what God does with us (Psalm 139), and something we see Jesus do time and again in the Gospels. Read John 4:1–26 and Luke 19:1–10. Consider how Jesus’ talking to, getting to know, and extending truth and grace to the Samaritan woman and Zacchaeus transformed their lives. If we are truly following in the way of Jesus, we should follow this example with one another. This act of being known—for good or for bad—and loved is a picture of the transforming love of Jesus. Since moms want this in their own lives, it’s a wonderful, affirming way to live out the “Golden Rule.”
Discussion Questions
[Q] Think about some ways you feel you’ve been labeled with a “fake I.D.” What are some ways the church could take the lead in getting to know women beyond any one role?
[Q] How has it felt when someone asks about you as a woman—not you as a mom? What’s
the difference between the two?
[Q] What does it tell you about the heart of Jesus that he took time to chat with the
Samaritan woman and Zacchaeus—two people who didn’t fit it?
[Q] What do Jesus’ actions of reaching out to these “misfits” tell you about how we should handle women in our congregation who might not fit traditional molds? Who are some moms Jesus might be calling you to reach out to right now?
[Q] What are some questions you wish others would ask you about yourself? How willing
are you to ask the same of other women?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Monday, February 15, 2010
Mama's Fake IDTeaching Point Two: Jesus expects you to live out your gifts.
Read Luke 12:35–48.
Jesus uses startling and violent images in this passage on “watchfulness” to drive home the need for his followers to use what they’ve been entrusted with to spread his gospel until he returns. Verse 48 famously says, “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.”
Each of God’s children has been given much—in the way of spiritual gifts, natural abilities, tangible blessings—and moms are no exception. Children are but one of the many (and certainly, the most amazing) gifts with which God chooses to bless people. But they don’t cancel out every other gift. If they did, one might expect Jesus to follow up this powerful passage with, “Unless, of course, you have kids. In that case, don’t worry about it.”
While oftentimes mothers may wish Jesus had said that, he didn’t. And God still longs for you— expects you even—to use what you’ve been given. Because the gifts he gives—kids included—all have kingdom purposes. Everyone has been “entrusted” with a variety of custom-made gifts intended to further the kingdom of God here on earth.
At the end of chapter 13 (“How to Help Other Moms Get Real”), Rivadeneira writes,
“Remember, God made you the way he did to meet needs (feed hungry stomachs, hang with
lonely people, seek justice) and reach people (those who are hurting and suffering and desperate for saving grace) all in his name, in your own way” (p. 187).
Discussion Questions
[Q] How do Jesus’ alarming words about servants being beaten for not using what they’ve been entrusted with affect the way you feel about gifts you haven’t used or valued?
[Q] One could argue that the gift of children “trumps” our other gifts from God. How do you feel or think about that? Do you believe God expects us to put our gifts on hold until our children grow up? Why or why not?
[Q] Read Luke 10:38–42 and Mark 14:3–9. Rivadeneira uses these two stories about Mary
of Bethany to show how Jesus treasures our gifts even when they don’t fit what other people expect from us or assume we should do. What do these stories mean to you as a mother?
[Q] Have you ever tried to offer a gift and been met with ridicule or rebuke, as happened to Mary? What was your response? How do you imagine Jesus would respond?
[Q] How have you experienced your particular gifts, passions, or personality reaching the world for Jesus? How might you continue to use what you’ve been entrusted with—as a mother and a woman—to reach this needy world?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Jesus uses startling and violent images in this passage on “watchfulness” to drive home the need for his followers to use what they’ve been entrusted with to spread his gospel until he returns. Verse 48 famously says, “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.”
Each of God’s children has been given much—in the way of spiritual gifts, natural abilities, tangible blessings—and moms are no exception. Children are but one of the many (and certainly, the most amazing) gifts with which God chooses to bless people. But they don’t cancel out every other gift. If they did, one might expect Jesus to follow up this powerful passage with, “Unless, of course, you have kids. In that case, don’t worry about it.”
While oftentimes mothers may wish Jesus had said that, he didn’t. And God still longs for you— expects you even—to use what you’ve been given. Because the gifts he gives—kids included—all have kingdom purposes. Everyone has been “entrusted” with a variety of custom-made gifts intended to further the kingdom of God here on earth.
At the end of chapter 13 (“How to Help Other Moms Get Real”), Rivadeneira writes,
“Remember, God made you the way he did to meet needs (feed hungry stomachs, hang with
lonely people, seek justice) and reach people (those who are hurting and suffering and desperate for saving grace) all in his name, in your own way” (p. 187).
Discussion Questions
[Q] How do Jesus’ alarming words about servants being beaten for not using what they’ve been entrusted with affect the way you feel about gifts you haven’t used or valued?
[Q] One could argue that the gift of children “trumps” our other gifts from God. How do you feel or think about that? Do you believe God expects us to put our gifts on hold until our children grow up? Why or why not?
[Q] Read Luke 10:38–42 and Mark 14:3–9. Rivadeneira uses these two stories about Mary
of Bethany to show how Jesus treasures our gifts even when they don’t fit what other people expect from us or assume we should do. What do these stories mean to you as a mother?
[Q] Have you ever tried to offer a gift and been met with ridicule or rebuke, as happened to Mary? What was your response? How do you imagine Jesus would respond?
[Q] How have you experienced your particular gifts, passions, or personality reaching the world for Jesus? How might you continue to use what you’ve been entrusted with—as a mother and a woman—to reach this needy world?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Mon's Fake I.D. Teaching Point One: God sees you as having more than one role.
Part 2 Discover the Eternal Principles
Read Psalm 139.
When David wrote these words, he was rejoicing in a God who saw him as more than any of his roles—more than a shepherd, more than a giant-slayer, more than a poet, a king, or a man on the run. He wrote beautifully of a God who knew him intimately—and who took the time to “search” and “know” him (v. 1). Certainly, this is no different for moms today. God values all of who he made you to be, and has specific purposes for the way he made you.
In chapter 4, Rivadeneira writes, “Think about the people you know that intimately: your spouse, your kids, maybe your closest friend, your parents. We know that much detail only about the people we love deeply—and are interested in the most. It’s the same with God. He knows us like that not only because he loves us but because he is vitally, untiringly interested in us. God finds you—as his creation, as his child—interesting and worth knowing. Why shouldn’t everyone else?” (p. 56).
Discussion Questions
[Q] Think of a time when you felt reduced to just one role. Did you feel that this was as God wanted it to be? Why or why not?
[Q] What does it mean to you that God takes time to search and know you? What does that say about why you may want others to do the same?
[Q] How do you feel knowing that God finds you interesting? Is that easy for you to
believe? Why or why not?
[Q] Psalm 139:16 says, “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” In what ways—if any—have you been made to feel that motherhood is the conclusion of God’s “book” for you?
[Q] What does your heart as a mother—and the way you care about your kids’ individual
identities and your desire to see them use their gifts—tell you about how God feels about you as a gifted, beloved child of God?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Read Psalm 139.
When David wrote these words, he was rejoicing in a God who saw him as more than any of his roles—more than a shepherd, more than a giant-slayer, more than a poet, a king, or a man on the run. He wrote beautifully of a God who knew him intimately—and who took the time to “search” and “know” him (v. 1). Certainly, this is no different for moms today. God values all of who he made you to be, and has specific purposes for the way he made you.
In chapter 4, Rivadeneira writes, “Think about the people you know that intimately: your spouse, your kids, maybe your closest friend, your parents. We know that much detail only about the people we love deeply—and are interested in the most. It’s the same with God. He knows us like that not only because he loves us but because he is vitally, untiringly interested in us. God finds you—as his creation, as his child—interesting and worth knowing. Why shouldn’t everyone else?” (p. 56).
Discussion Questions
[Q] Think of a time when you felt reduced to just one role. Did you feel that this was as God wanted it to be? Why or why not?
[Q] What does it mean to you that God takes time to search and know you? What does that say about why you may want others to do the same?
[Q] How do you feel knowing that God finds you interesting? Is that easy for you to
believe? Why or why not?
[Q] Psalm 139:16 says, “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” In what ways—if any—have you been made to feel that motherhood is the conclusion of God’s “book” for you?
[Q] What does your heart as a mother—and the way you care about your kids’ individual
identities and your desire to see them use their gifts—tell you about how God feels about you as a gifted, beloved child of God?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Friday, February 5, 2010
Mama's Got a Fake I.D.
Part 1 Identify the Current Issue
This study works best if you have read the book Mama’s Got a Fake I.D. , by Caryn Dahlstrand Rivadeneira.
Whether on Oprah, in magazines, or at a local MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group, you’ll hear a similar theme from today’s moms (and you know this if you are one!): they wrestle with a sense of having lost who they are in the mix of love and responsibility that comes with being a mom. As much as they love their kids and they love being moms, this loss of identity leaves many women feeling lonely, anonymous, and frustrated. This particularly frustrates Christian moms, who feel the additional sting of wondering what God has in store for them now that they are moms—especially if their gifts don’t match their new mom role. While they may once have felt solid in their God-given gifts and purpose, motherhood can reduce many women to feeling unable to do anything right—or well—and wondering if God didn’t make a mistake in the way he gifted them, or even by giving them children.
While churches do a great job of supporting the mom role in general, many moms feel they don’t do a good job supporting women who deal with these issues. In fact, Rivadeneira contends that many Christians push the idea that once you become a mom, God’s only use for you is to raise godly kids and help out in the church nursery. In the beginning of chapter 4 (“Why God Cares About Who You Are”), Rivadeneira writes that this is the reason why “being a mom who wants to be used by God in a wide variety of ways can feel so selfish even when we know it’s not. But because there are so many well-meaning Christians who really do think moms should be happy to invest everything they have in their children, I think we moms need to explore the will of God for women whom he has blessed with children. God cares about us as people, not just as mothers” (p. 53).
Discussion Starters:
[Q] In what ways have you felt a loss of identity in your role as a mom? Where or when do you feel this most acutely?
[Q] How has your sense of purpose or giftedness changed since you became a mom? Do
you now feel that God expects something different from you, or that he wants you to
“shelve” some of your gifts and abilities for a while?
[Q] What’s been your experience at church regarding your role as mom versus you as a more well-rounded woman? Are you made to feel selfish, as Rivadeneira writes, for wanting to be used by God in a variety of ways and not just in your mom role?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
This study works best if you have read the book Mama’s Got a Fake I.D. , by Caryn Dahlstrand Rivadeneira.
Whether on Oprah, in magazines, or at a local MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) group, you’ll hear a similar theme from today’s moms (and you know this if you are one!): they wrestle with a sense of having lost who they are in the mix of love and responsibility that comes with being a mom. As much as they love their kids and they love being moms, this loss of identity leaves many women feeling lonely, anonymous, and frustrated. This particularly frustrates Christian moms, who feel the additional sting of wondering what God has in store for them now that they are moms—especially if their gifts don’t match their new mom role. While they may once have felt solid in their God-given gifts and purpose, motherhood can reduce many women to feeling unable to do anything right—or well—and wondering if God didn’t make a mistake in the way he gifted them, or even by giving them children.
While churches do a great job of supporting the mom role in general, many moms feel they don’t do a good job supporting women who deal with these issues. In fact, Rivadeneira contends that many Christians push the idea that once you become a mom, God’s only use for you is to raise godly kids and help out in the church nursery. In the beginning of chapter 4 (“Why God Cares About Who You Are”), Rivadeneira writes that this is the reason why “being a mom who wants to be used by God in a wide variety of ways can feel so selfish even when we know it’s not. But because there are so many well-meaning Christians who really do think moms should be happy to invest everything they have in their children, I think we moms need to explore the will of God for women whom he has blessed with children. God cares about us as people, not just as mothers” (p. 53).
Discussion Starters:
[Q] In what ways have you felt a loss of identity in your role as a mom? Where or when do you feel this most acutely?
[Q] How has your sense of purpose or giftedness changed since you became a mom? Do
you now feel that God expects something different from you, or that he wants you to
“shelve” some of your gifts and abilities for a while?
[Q] What’s been your experience at church regarding your role as mom versus you as a more well-rounded woman? Are you made to feel selfish, as Rivadeneira writes, for wanting to be used by God in a variety of ways and not just in your mom role?
©2009 Christianity Today International ChristianBibleStudies.com
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
Inteview with Author and Poet Tiffany Easley
Author and Poetess Tiffany Easley is one of the forty women featured in the new release Victorious Living for Women. Worth More than Rubies had the pleasure of interviewing Tiffany. She will also be featured on Worth More than Rubies Radio Saturday, January 9, 2010, at 3:00pm CST. Log on to Blog Talk Radio and listen to her interview or call in to 646-595-3716. Enjoy!
Where are you from?
I am originally from Lexington, TN and currently reside in Nashville, TN.
Tell us how long you’ve been writing and what made you get into the literary field?
I have been writing since the age of 9. God blessed me with the gift to write poetry and from poetry I have began to write devotionals.
What was your inspiration for participating in Victorious Living for Women?
In 2006, God spoke to me and told me to share my story! Victorious Living for Women has provided me the platform to do so.
Tell us about your book?
This book is a collaborative work of 40 women from 18 states sharing their personal testimony of Victorious Living. My Chapter is entitled Refreshing Wind In the Midst of Your Storm. The chapter is intended to :
1- How to stand in the midst of the storm, knowing that God is the author and finisher of your faith (Hebrews 12:2) and how to let He who began a good work finish it to completion (Philippians 1:6).
2- How to grow and mature from the experience of the storm, seeking from God His fresh-new revelation each day.
3- How to give forth (exhale) to others by sharing your experience as a vital part of spiritual transformation and maturation.
What other books have you authored? Tell us about them.
Psalms of my Spirit is a collection of poetry which shares the message of love for God, self, and others, written in 2004.
Are you working on new material? If so, tell us about what you are currently working on and when we can expect to see it on the market?
I am working on a few projects:
1- Victorious Living for Mothers, a Suber-Pullins collaborative work due to be released in May 2010.
2-A reflective devotional due to be released in Dec. 2010. I will not disclose the name of it at this time, because it is a special project dear to me that will be dedicated to a close friend who lost her battle with cancer in December of 2009.
How can others reach you?
Facebook-Tiffany Easley
Website:Pursuing Victory
e-mail:blessedpoetess@yahoo.com
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